TOPIC: LOVE AND SUBMISSION IN MARRIAGE 1
MEMORISE: “So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself.” – (Ephesians 5:28)
READ: Ephesians 5:21-33 (KJV)
Many men complain that their wives are not submissive to them. I have been married for over fifty-four years now, and I have also been privileged to be used by God to help resolve many marital issues from experience and the word of God.
In a Christian marriage, wives are required to be submissive to their husbands as unto the Lord (Ephesians 5:22). However, over the years I have observed a number of reasons why some wives find it difficult to submit to their husbands. The first is if a wife does not feel loved. I want you to take note that I did not say, “If she is not loved”, but rather said, “If she does not feel loved”.
You cannot love somebody the way you want, you have to love them the way they want, for them to feel loved. If a wife does not feel loved, she would most likely struggle with reciprocating with submission as the Bible says.
Understand your wife and get to know what makes her feel loved. Some men think that merely buying gifts would show love, whereas their wives just want to spend time with them. Not all the time a man spends with his wife should be for prayers; some of the time should be just to play. Many people see me as a very serious person, but behind closed doors with my wife, I play a lot. I enjoy spending time with my wife so much.
One day, after just arriving in America, I went to our room, only to discover that my wife went to another part of the house. When she still hadn’t returned to our room after a while, I went looking for her. One of the people in the house asked, “Daddy, why are you looking for Mummy so much, weren’t you together all through the flight? Didn’t she just leave you a few minutes ago?” I told him jokingly to mind his business.
During the day, put a call through to her every now and then just to let her know that you are thinking of her. Those who travel with me know that it doesn’t matter how far from home I am or how busy I am wherever I have gone, I must speak to my wife every single day. I tell her constantly that I love her and so it is easy for her to submit.
Women would naturally find it difficult to submit to someone who does not love them. Please think of what you can do to show your wife that you love her and do it consistently.
ACTION POINT: I want you to have a meeting with your spouse this morning. Ask him or her if he or she feels loved, then ask for what you can start doing to demonstrate your love.
BIBLE IN ONE YEAR: Psalms 43-45